Today on the podcast:
There are books out there and experts who are much better qualified to speak on this topic; but understanding these all helped me so much over the years, so I wanted to share them in today’s podcast.
Hopefully it helps.
Episode Outline
- 04:55 Projection and handling my own insecurities
- 16:28 Opportunity cost and spending time doing the wrong thing or with the wrong people
- 21:22 Sunk-cost fallacy and continuing to do something even though you know your ladder is against the wrong wall
- 26:13 Confirmation bias and the problem with being in an echo chamber with emotional vampires
- 32:24 Forward projection and future self techniques
- 37:36 Pre-mortems or unpacking the worst-case scenario
- 45:38 Hindsight bias and why people will have an opinion on whatever you decide to do (so you may as well do the things you want)
- 50:03 Negativity bias and why negative comments take up so much mental real estate
- 54:09 Action bias and shiny object syndrome
- 59:37 The “I’ll be happy when…” fallacy
- 1:02:29 Attachment styles – anxious, avoidant, and secure
Key Points
- Catch yourself projecting your insecurities onto others by first recognizing that a lot of it happens underneath the surface. Projection is ego-driven and is often triggered by the comparison trap. Similarly, any belief we hold, including about ourselves, contains in it a tendency to fall into confirmation bias to reinforce those beliefs, whether from the things we read or watch online or from the people we listen to.
- If you had to start from zero today, would you keep doing what you’re doing? If this was the only relationship/job/nutrition or training plan you can have for the rest of your life, would you be happy? Asking yourself these questions on a regular basis will stop you from falling into the sunk-cost fallacy and live a more fulfilled life lived on your own terms. Along with this, understand that happiness is a journey, not an event. Happiness comes to those with an abundance mindset, and not a scarcity mindset.
- When it comes to the bigger questions and decisions, ask yourself how your future self would regard your current circumstances before making a choice. Conducting a pre-mortem before taking action is also extremely valuable so that you can always keep the worst-case scenario of any situation firmly in mind to guide you.
Powerful Quotes by Brian
- Being able to separate opinions from facts is the first step towards critical analysis on anything that’s being offered to you, whether it’s opinions or advice.
- In order to get the things you want, you should let the right things catch up to you.
- You’re better off at the bottom of the ladder against the right wall than halfway up the ladder against the wrong wall.
- If you’re trying to minimize your regrets in life, one of the ways you can do that is by fast-forwarding to your deathbed.
- Live life on your terms because people are going to have an opinion on what you do regardless of what you do – whether it’s good, bad, indifferent, right, or wrong.